I've been watching Lie to Me, the series about lie detection and the like. At first I thought it was really interesting, and I was drawn to the concept because I felt like I would become better at figuring out when people are lying. The trouble with that is, I do have instincts and I generally don't trust them - I think the ratio is about 50/50 for that being a good or bad thing. However, after finishing the first season, maybe this series is just making me more paranoid. I already have unsettled trust issues, and I think I've good reason to justify that. And some people tell me to trust my intuition, while others tell me to drop the inhibitions to give everyone a chance. All I know for sure is that I've played with fire too many times.
The show brings up deeply-seeded feelings of empathy for the people who are deceived, betrayed, torn apart and devastated. I've been in or damn near tears with this series much moreso than any others -- I can't tell if this is healthy for me or not but after the developments of recent years, of this I am sure: I would rather not love at all, than love and fall. And I thought of that all by myself during a conversation with Chad - yeah, we were pretty impressed too.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Gone Country
So after the holidays things have definitely calmed down *PHEW*, but still lots going on. The weekend before last, Victor came to visit from Seattle!! I always wondered what it would be like to host visitors from another city and I had previously thought that I'd know exactly where to take them. Nope. Turns out, it's harder than it looks. I took him to some of my favorite places to eat! And we went to Medjool, Redwood Room, Rogue, Holy Cow, and a few of the other regular spots. It was a kind of a crazy weekend, and we didn't get to go to the Sharks game, but I think he and his friends had fun! I know I did!! :)
I also started a NERT class last week with the Al Pals & co. I've already learned a lot of things I feel I should have known about safety, how to react, and useful tips for emergency disaster/awareness. Even though sitting through class for hours is super tiring after work, it was nice to be "learning" again and in a lecture environment. I miss school! And I am SO glad we're taking this class, I know we'll be so much better off ... just in case..
I've been going out lots and soaking up as much time as I can with my wonderful friends, I even went to my first dog birthday party on Sunday! It was entertaining to say the least, I just love staring at dogs. I drove Bear to the dog party and thankfully he didn't try to eat or paw Klaus. Everything has been awesome thus far, almost three weeks into the new year and I'm lovin' it!
I think I'm starting to outgrow hip hop. And I'm definitely tired of hearing Katy Perry, Bruno Mars, and Kesha, over and over again on ALL of the radio stations. I've started listening to COUNTRY! And I will close with a few of my new fave songs :)
I also started a NERT class last week with the Al Pals & co. I've already learned a lot of things I feel I should have known about safety, how to react, and useful tips for emergency disaster/awareness. Even though sitting through class for hours is super tiring after work, it was nice to be "learning" again and in a lecture environment. I miss school! And I am SO glad we're taking this class, I know we'll be so much better off ... just in case..
I've been going out lots and soaking up as much time as I can with my wonderful friends, I even went to my first dog birthday party on Sunday! It was entertaining to say the least, I just love staring at dogs. I drove Bear to the dog party and thankfully he didn't try to eat or paw Klaus. Everything has been awesome thus far, almost three weeks into the new year and I'm lovin' it!
I think I'm starting to outgrow hip hop. And I'm definitely tired of hearing Katy Perry, Bruno Mars, and Kesha, over and over again on ALL of the radio stations. I've started listening to COUNTRY! And I will close with a few of my new fave songs :)
Sunday, January 2, 2011
New Years Resolutions
I think I started 2011 off right, for once in my life. In the past, I've gone into celebrating new years with high hopes - the search for "the" dress, fancy clubs with expensive covers, and some small part of me secretly hoping to magically meet a super hot guy from which I will elicit the most perfect new years kiss.
In my years of celebration, this has NEVER happened. Far from it actually -- I generally go home the first day of the new year dearly disappointed. And maybe that's why the past few years have been tainted with disappointment, let-downs and broken expectations. From the lies and deceit, being betrayed by the closest person to me this past year, and learning to forgive someone who never deserved my trust to begin with a year before, I've definitely been doing something wrong.
This year will be different though. I think I've evolved as a person and learned not to overly-invest myself -- you know, keep it simple. This New Years Eve was indeed simple and unplanned. I went to lunch with my parents Friday afternoon, then went to a bar on Polk street with my closest friends at night. I wasn't even sure if I was going to go out at night, I was truly content with staying home and relaxing. Although, I am glad that I did go out because I ended up having a good time. The night was short, and I did not have enough to drink -- and even though it doesn't sound like the best New Years celebration, it really was.
Because I started off the New Year with Alex and Andy, the Al Pals who always have my back and I care about soooo much. Because I wasn't plastered and didn't NEED to go home early. Because I didn't care who I met or where I was. Because the dress I wore to the bar I found when I was looking for something else. Because nothing was planned, nothing at all was certain. Because there were no expectations and no false promises culminating in my subconscious. Because even though I wasn't expecting it, I ended up getting a new years kiss.
Because of all of these things, my New Years celebration was ab-so-lutely perfect. I couldn't have had a better time and if this is ANY indication of what the next year will be like I am VERY excited for what is to come. Over the past years, I've learned how to appreciate the most important things in life. And not only have I FINALLY learned to be genuinely happy alone, I've also learned how to gauge who I can trust and who should truly matter.
Consequently, I don't really have any specific New Years resolutions this year. For 2011 I know that I must better myself and expand my horizons on all fronts. I will take life each day at a time and push myself in my career and social life. I've already signed up for community service events in the coming months, so I'm well on my way to helping others. If I continue to try my best at everything I do I know that everything else will fall into place.
And to be thorough, my resolutions from last years post:
1. Read more
2. Drink, and go out, less
3. Take more pictures
4. Eat healthier and stay in shape
5. Be less of a flaker for social events
I can proudly say that I've made significant progress in all 5 areas through 2010. To all of my friends and anyone who is reading this, I wish you all the best for the new year and success in any and many endeavors. Here's to 2011 --
In my years of celebration, this has NEVER happened. Far from it actually -- I generally go home the first day of the new year dearly disappointed. And maybe that's why the past few years have been tainted with disappointment, let-downs and broken expectations. From the lies and deceit, being betrayed by the closest person to me this past year, and learning to forgive someone who never deserved my trust to begin with a year before, I've definitely been doing something wrong.
This year will be different though. I think I've evolved as a person and learned not to overly-invest myself -- you know, keep it simple. This New Years Eve was indeed simple and unplanned. I went to lunch with my parents Friday afternoon, then went to a bar on Polk street with my closest friends at night. I wasn't even sure if I was going to go out at night, I was truly content with staying home and relaxing. Although, I am glad that I did go out because I ended up having a good time. The night was short, and I did not have enough to drink -- and even though it doesn't sound like the best New Years celebration, it really was.
Because I started off the New Year with Alex and Andy, the Al Pals who always have my back and I care about soooo much. Because I wasn't plastered and didn't NEED to go home early. Because I didn't care who I met or where I was. Because the dress I wore to the bar I found when I was looking for something else. Because nothing was planned, nothing at all was certain. Because there were no expectations and no false promises culminating in my subconscious. Because even though I wasn't expecting it, I ended up getting a new years kiss.
Because of all of these things, my New Years celebration was ab-so-lutely perfect. I couldn't have had a better time and if this is ANY indication of what the next year will be like I am VERY excited for what is to come. Over the past years, I've learned how to appreciate the most important things in life. And not only have I FINALLY learned to be genuinely happy alone, I've also learned how to gauge who I can trust and who should truly matter.
Consequently, I don't really have any specific New Years resolutions this year. For 2011 I know that I must better myself and expand my horizons on all fronts. I will take life each day at a time and push myself in my career and social life. I've already signed up for community service events in the coming months, so I'm well on my way to helping others. If I continue to try my best at everything I do I know that everything else will fall into place.
And to be thorough, my resolutions from last years post:
1. Read more
2. Drink, and go out, less
3. Take more pictures
4. Eat healthier and stay in shape
5. Be less of a flaker for social events
I can proudly say that I've made significant progress in all 5 areas through 2010. To all of my friends and anyone who is reading this, I wish you all the best for the new year and success in any and many endeavors. Here's to 2011 --
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